In Philippians 4:13 I am reminded that, "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."
I feel like the apostle Paul did not write this with modern day mothers in mind. I suspect he would have provided additional clarification had he known that some of us (we know who we are) would some day use this verse to try to prove to ourselves that we can do it all, be it all, and still be home in time for dinner.
Like, maybe adding, and "all things" does not mean being a super-human, perfectly manicured soccer mom who still fits into her jeans from high-school, is successful at everything she does, and shows up to every single social event on time with a loaf of banana bread in hand.
Thanks Paul. Your omission has cost us our sanity.
We know what Paul is technically referring to in this verse but still, who among us has never whispered these words while trying to push ourselves to cross off one last item on our to-do list?
At what point does the craziness stop? At what point is it okay to be an overweight, tired mother who is just doing the best we can? At what point can we give ourselves credit for getting the kids out the door fully clothed, healthy, and clean (enough)? At what point can we acknowledge that being a mom is freakin hard work and its okay to trash your to-do list because sometimes you just come home exhausted and don't have it in you to pay another bill, put away dishes, fold anymore laundry, bake a casserole for the freezer, or pull on exercise pants for more than the pure joy and comfort of wearing stretchy fabric?
I know the world will still spin even if I'm not the church council secretary or a singer in our worship team. And I'm fairly positive that I would still have a job even if I had not decided to go back to school. And my children will still be happy and healthy if I have to reschedule a few of their appointments because I just don't have time to take another half-day off work to fight traffic and waiting room crowds.
But ...there are days that I look around me and tell myself that if X can do this, so can I. Obviously they have proven that it can be done, and I have no excuse for my imperfections. But the truth is... they aren't perfect either. And X has gone to a lot of trouble to try to prove otherwise; sometimes even more trouble than it's worth.
For the most part, I enjoy all of the activities that I choose to participate in. It's the "other" stuff that makes me feel overwhelmed. I wish I could cut that stuff out. But I'm a mom. So I can't. I guess that's what I signed up for.
But, I can try to find happiness in all that I do. And I can try to stop being so hard on myself and stop trying to justify what is, or is not, on my list of priorities each day. And I can stop trying to be perfect or successful at all that I do.
And I can enjoy life.
There's always that.