I don't normally like to give out advice, unless someone has actually asked me for it. That's kind of my thing....I hate unsolicited advice and assume that everyone else feels the same way.
However, due to a few recent happenings I feel that perhaps, just this once, I'll break my own rule and dish out a few thoughts. You can take them or leave them. And, I won't be offended if you leave them.
Here we go...
1. So you're not a parent of a child under the age of 12? Well then, feel free to keep your "you should be doing it this way" look to yourself. Things have changed some in the decade since your child was my child's age and I don't appreciate your annoyed stare. I'm going to need you to put on your adult pants and just look away.
2. There are only a few times I can say this and actually mean it....Yes, I am the end-all, say-all, all-knowing person on a particular professionally-related subject (to remain unnamed). What I say goes. Don't question my advice. Just listen to it.
3. I don't care who you are or how often you frequent your local Starbucks. It is never okay to bypass the line (especially on a busy Wednesday morning) to wait for a barista to notice you, make your drink (while those in line are forced to wait longer), and then take your money in between other customers. We all have places to be honey so get your rear in line and wait your turn! Plus, really? You leave your house with hair like that? Wow....
4. When you're at Target and all of the lines look long, don't despair. There are way too many idiots who miss the second row of registers. Those always have shorter lines so find one and get in there. You might have to muscle your way past one of those idiots that I mentioned earlier but believe me, Target has two rows of registers for a reason and it's not their fault that some people don't know how to get into double lines.
5. Wait at crosswalks. Yes there are a million students running around this town, crossing the streets wherever and whenever they jolly well please. But, that doesn't mean you need to put your own life in danger and cross with them. And, to the young man who made fun of me for waiting last night, refusing to cross so that traffic could proceed...learn some respect.
6. Sometimes it is okay to let your two-year-old win. Sometimes.
7. Did you break the color printer in your office? Here's an easy fix- bagels on Friday for everyone!
8. Groceries can be purchased later, bathrooms can be cleaned this weekend, and, if it sits long enough, laundry will fold itself.
9. Are you new here? I bet you have a brilliant idea for an organization-wide initiative, yes? Perhaps your idea isn't as original as you think. You might consider holding it in until after the big meeting and then maybe just discuss it privately with a few people.
10. Always plan ahead. Giving a big speech soon? Make sure your presentation slides will work in the room you're presenting in and that you know how to use the equipment. Hungry for ice cream? Wait until after you put the child to bed to get it out. Planning a trip to Florida in January? Pay the extra $40 and buy the trip cancellation insurance.
Happy Friday everyone!