Like all other parents, my husband and I have no doubt that our little girl is in fact the most precious child ever. I’m pretty sure she was by far the cutest newborn I have ever seen and I am convinced that whenever she smiles God feels just a little bit better about himself for creating her. Yep, she’s perfect.
The last few weeks have been rough for us. Jake’s schedule has kept him away a lot so on top of working full-time at work and home I have also been dangerously close to living the life of a single mother. God bless those people. It’s not unusual for me to get up at 5:15 and start working and not stop until 10:30 at night when I can finally sit down. I am exhausted but my baby’s tummy is full and her eyes are shut tight, my laundry is folded (but probably not yet put away), my bills are paid, I have put in a full day’s work and still found time to breath (at least a little bit). It’s about that time that I also start feeling guilty for being relieved that our little jumping bean is finally in bed. Her level of energy makes me tired.
But, all is not lost. Just when I was on the verge of having a small melt down the good Lord sent me a horrible headache. Last evening my head hurt so badly I couldn’t walk straight so I reluctantly asked Jake to please help me take care of Rachel. I felt guilty for asking for help. I felt guilty for taking up his study time. I felt guilty for feeling grateful that I didn’t have to run after my child all evening. But, then it happened….
Last night, for the first time ever, Rachel stopped running and about 30 minutes before bedtime she sat quietly while I read to her. It was amazing. We read the same two books over and over and over again and it was marvelous. All of the guilt and frustration and weariness melted away as I lay next to my little R and told her all about farm animals and teddy bears and jackets and hats. I can’t wait to do it all again tonight.
P.S. Did you know that we wear jackets to cover our backs, long-sleeves to cover our elbows and shirts to cover our belly buttons? I hope she remembers that when she’s 16.