A few weeks ago, while at a routine doctor appointment, the nurse asked me how many hours I work. I replied that I work full-time so, 40 hours a week. Her next question was a bit surprising and caught me off guard. She asked me how many hours a week my daughter spends in daycare to which I replied, "...umm...ahhh....well......she's at daycare a lot more than she's at home so umm....let me think.....umm....(calculating in my head)...she's there at least 50 hours a week." Then the guilt set in (but that's a whole other blog post).
I have to wonder, why is it that Jake and I went to great lengths to find the perfect daycare but I'm willing to settle for a job that I'm really not that excited about, even though Rachel and I are both at our respective locations more than we're at home? I appreciate my job and am thankful for the people I work with. But, I didn't go to night classes for 5 years, while working two jobs, so that I can be a secretary for the rest of my life. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being a secretary. However, contrary to some people's beliefs, I really feel like I'm destined for bigger things.
I wish that I could figure out just how big these other things should be. I love the fact that I can leave work and actually leave work...you know what I mean? Unless I had a particularly crappy day, I don't take my work home with me and I'm out the door by 5:02. I have to ask though, how much further can I climb up the corporate ladder before I can't make those claims anymore? Is it possible to enjoy work (at least the majority of the time) and still be home by 6:00? It must be because other people do it all the time. Why can't I?
Until I figure this out I will not be shoving anything job related, except the papers that I am currently paid to push.